TRULY FORGIVING
One day, a Gursikh brother gave a singhni an empty sack and a basket of potatoes.
"Think of all the people who have done or said something against you in the recent past, especially those you cannot forgive. For each of them, inscribe the name on a potato and put it in the sack."
The singhni came up with quite a few names and soon her sack was heavy with potatoes.
"Carry the sack with you wherever you go for a week," said the Gursikh. "We'll talk after that."
At first, the singhni thought nothing of it. Carrying the sack was not particularly difficult but after a while, it became more of a burden. It sometimes got in the way and it seemed to require more effort to carry as time went on, even though its weight remained the same.
After a few days, the sack began to smell. The carved potatoes gave off a ripe odour.
Not only were they increasingly inconvenient to carry around, they were also becoming rather unpleasant.
Finally, the week was over.
The Gursikh questioned the Singhni, "Any thoughts about all this?"
"Yes," the Singhni replied. "When we are unable to forgive others, we carry negative feelings with us everywhere, much like these potatoes. That negativity becomes a burden to us and after a while, it festers."
"Yes, that is exactly what happens when one holds a grudge. So, how can we lighten the load?"
"We must strive to forgive. Forgiving someone is the equivalent of removing the corresponding potato from the sack."
"How many of your transgressors are you able to forgive?"
"I've thought about it quite a bit ji," the Singhni said. "It required much effort, but I have decided to forgive all of them."
"Very well, we can remove all the potatoes. Were there any more people who transgressed against you this last week?"
The Singhni thought for a while and admitted there were. Then she felt panic, when she realised her empty sack was about to get filled up again.
"Veer ji (brother)," she asked, "if we continue like this, wouldn't there always be potatoes in the sack week after week?"
"Yes, as long as people speak or act against you in some way, you will always have potatoes."
"But Veer ji, we can never control what others do." So what good is divine wisdom (bibek budh) in this case?"
"We're not at the realm of Divine wisdom (Gyaan) yet.
"Everything we have talked about so far is the conventional approach to forgiveness. It is the same thing that many philosophies and most religions preach. We must constantly strive to forgive for it is an important virtue. This is not the divine wisdom Sikhi teaches us because there is no striving in Sikhi."
"Then what is divine wisdom (bibek budh/Gyaan) in Sikhi, Veer ji?"
"You can figure it out. If the potatoes are negative feelings, then what is the sack?"
"The sack is... that which allows me to hold on to the negativity. It is something within us that makes us dwell on feeling offended.... Ah, it is my inflated sense of self-importance (ego/mind)."
"And what will happen if you let go of it?"
"Then... the things that people do or say against me no longer seem like such a major issue."
"In that case, you won't have any names to inscribe on potatoes. That means no more weight to carry around, and no more bad smells. The Gyaan/bibek budh of forgiveness is the conscious decision to not just remove some potatoes... but to relinquish the entire sack."
The sack, which is the polluted egotistical mind, will only be purified through 24/7 meditation on Gods name.
This is the Sikh's purpose in life.. Relinquish the sack/mind to conquer the universe.
Guru Nanak Dev Ji Says, "He forgives those with whom He is pleased; they silence their egotism and pride through Gods name"
Vaheguroo!